Hitting the Wall

Last Saturday, although a bit overdue with this post was crazy. Running on a Saturday after 4 days of work was crazy difficult. Maybe cuz I was too tired or maybe the fact that I didn’t have sugar in my teas at work. Either way, running from Bt. TImah hill to MR was fine. But the moment we hit MR, I hit the wall. For the first time in I have no idea how long ago, I think it was Nov 2008 last, I never felt so worn out and messed up. I lost my rhythm near the golf course and ended up walking a real long dist. No amount of Powergels or Gatorade or music seemed to help. Thanks to Elaine, for whom I’m so glad encouraged me and talked to me all the way and ended up walking with me and then slow jog and then walk again. She undying spirit is amazing. Eventually, at 24km, I decided to call it quits after a series of bouts of cramps and the realization that it’s better to quit now and run another day than to finish it suffering another atleast 10 km or so. This, I think was the wisest decision I’ve taken although it’s been the first DNF (Did Not Finish) run. As Jimmy was driving us back home, that’s when it hit me. Heat exhaustion. For one you start to feel tired suddenly and head starts to spin. Hearing is shut down and then colour just fades off to see everything move from black and white to a dull and dim solaris photo effect. The only thing I could muster to say, which I think saved me was… Partner, do u have water with you? She instantly looked back from the front and said, ‘Hey, u ok anot?’ as she handed me a bottle of ice mountain. One gulp the whole 500ml was gone and I was back alive. That’s when I realised that stopping at the 24km mark was the right thing to do.

Today was much, much better. Maybe cuz we started early or I had carbo-loaded to the max last night or the fact that we were running on the road. The point is that I had done SOMETHING right.  Also, at work, my tea always had sugar and I brought along something to munch at 430-5pm as I do work.  Anyway, Elaine and me started at 515 and clocked 10km before meeting the Punggol Runners gang for another 20km. A solid start to a week. And although we stopped running at about 27.5km cuz Elaine was super duper-hungry, we were more than happy to have run for about 2h 55m or so. Not a bad timing at all. Pretty consistent all through the run. We called it quits at tt time and went to McD to grab a drink tog. 27.5km or 30km… all the same la. Just another 20 mins anyway. Today the dudes and the dudettes ran to Punggol Park for the first time. Although the sun was up and it was starting to scorch, it was still a great run cuz we were not running around the same place (SK/YCK Rd/Thompson) and so was a great refreshing start to the week! The greatest realization today was that for my age, height and weight, I actually burn about 70 calories/km. Which means, today I burnt one whole day’s worth of calories in just 3 hrs… wow! Not so easy come but so easy go. Maybe that’s why I hit the wall next weekend. I’m so gonna potato load myself (just like Sundown) on the 23rd to prep for TNF 100.

Our super chummy Punggol Running Club gang!

Numb Weekend

Cuz my legs are worn out till they’re numb.

I have no idea how, but I managed to decently finish TNF 100 Progressive Run 2 of 20km on Saturday and Run NUS 2009 of 12km on Sunday.  Surprisingly, both with good timing too! =)

Thanks to the ultimate Care Bear, Jimmy, he volunteered to pick up and drop (to and fro) Mike, Elaine and me from our place in SK although he lives in Pasir Ris. He’s given me lifts so many times, I’ve lost count! TNF started with high spirits with us talking a lot of bull between us, a lot of insider jokes and pulling each others’ legs! The run started with an immediate claustrophobic feeling of running in thick vegetation with muddy terrain (since it rained the night before) and roots, braches, dead falls and forest litter all around the place. And the only thing that was missing, came around – rain. Although I was drenced to the bone, thankfully the forest gave sufficient shelter from the worst part of the rain so some of the body heat was conserved well and cold didn’t hit as fast. Trail running is so monontonous it’s just staring at the shoes of the person in front of you and hope you don’t slip and fall over the muddy roots – like Elaine did, twice, on the way back. The opening from the thick vegetation was a welcome sight at the PUB but then it was more bashing through a thin trail between tall lalangs near the PUB fence. Thankfully, the sun was out by then, so the timing was more than perfect! Thanks to the terrain was not being as undulating as the one we did the week before, most of the energy was kept right in and enabled me to still push up all the slopes without much difficulty. The major of the problem however, was the ankle twsisting and the slippy muddy slopes and roots – where I hit my already injured toe again. Hurt like hell tt one! The biggest challenge of all of course was navigating through the trails cuz they all look the same without any markers. TNF guys really need to work on this for the next progressive run. As exciting and novel the route and the terrain was, yet, it surely reminded me of times I spent alone in Brunei during Chill Hermit. Somehow, the old Devils keep coming back once the going gets tough. Maybe once u go thru that, ull get tougher and get going again. Also since she’s my parter and her morale plumetted to abolute zero after her two falls, second of which caused an open wound, I kept with her till the end point – tts wat partners are for, rite? Although, she was injured and I was mildly pissed off cuz of the slippiness, we both managed to run the route (yes, some people got lost 1/2 way thru the return and popped up from all over BT hil but all back in one piece), thanks to an experienced uncle who brought Elaine, an ang moh couple and me out to the right path. In fact, we clocked a good time for the 20km – 2h:12m:32s. We both look forward to more runs together – the first of which will be this Thu evening. =)

Run NUS 2009 was a different affair altogether – with road running and lots of slopes. Thanks to the Tri-tights that I got, my legs although sore were good to go for Sunday. As expected, there were delays. But thankfully, it was not as bad as 2007 – where ti was delayed by more than an hour and the sun was blazing away. Andrew was so desperate to start, he screwed the registration process for the NUS Men and just jumped in the same wave as me. Well, I was supposed to go for Wave 3 but jumped into Wave 2, cuz I was getting annoyed with the heat turning up. So, if my time is amazing fast on the results page and the cert, add 10mins to it. Tts my real time – 59:23 – not amazing in my current best timings for 12km but surely PB for the hell of the terrain that NUS and Kent Ridge has. As andrew said, I think we have both come a long, long way from Run NUS 2008. Since the route was almost the same, we did much much better this year. Thanks to all the hill training for me and his hill and stair training for his MIR training. The results of this was that we were both, at different timings overtaken by only two people – Mok Ying Ren (AH DUH! He flew past me at 4km+ near the SPC station) and his friend (who was close behind) who neither of us know the name of – sorry bro. And as fate would have it, when I was at Science Park, the rain hit again. This was more welcome to me rather than a pain cuz I would have given up if the sun were out! The last 3km was a blistering downpour and this time around, I didn’t have the protection the forest had to give. Either way, since I was almost at the last leg of the race, I was looking forward to finishing it rather than be bothered by the rain. As I ascended the UH slope, I was expecting to get on the track and end the race – however, there was a twist to the run this year. We had to go around the sheltered walkway that links Science and AYE and back to the track. Maybe, cuz of the lightning, they altered the route. For me it was a good run, however, I guess for Wave 5+ or so (can’t) be too sure, they had to scrap the event. I think for John (if he came, cu he was down with a bad tummy) and Jimmy, who just arrived as I was heading back after the hard run, it was a disappointment cuz they didn’t get to run this year. So as assholic as it was to jump the waves and stuff, Andrew and me, it seems made the right choice to just go ahead and run. Apologies to the organisiers for messing it up for you guys. So if you’re reading this and intend to go for Run NUS 2010, plan on registering as Men’s Open rather than other categories. They’re usually the first few waves to flag off – u get an opportunity to beat the elements.

Last evening, Dad wanted to go jalan jalan at ECP. So although I was sore all day, it was a good change to go there not for any activites but to walk about, talk cork and slack. Maybe he decided this cuz there was nothing good on Zee. Either way, we got some good family time together.

Tts all for the weekend. My calves were sore all day yesterday and this morning. Tmr morning, I wanna got for a 25k LSD – if I can wake up, legs feel ok and the weather holds. Too many variables.

On a totally different note, feelings on both sides seem to have worn off, it’s always a good sign – since it is mutual. Sometimes, some distance and space of course time, teaches what is important for now.

WinKey + R

Well, it’s been almost a week since my last post and I should blog about what I’ve been doing this week, except of course job applications and an interview here and there.

Tuesday was my second driving lesson in an auto car. ATC is so much easier than manual esp cuz it takes mind off all the ‘mumbo jumbo’ and keeps me focussed on the road. And when it comes to a hell hole driving place like Ubi, I think it’s for the best to go for auto – atleast for me. Driving around, Ubi seemed to be much more pleasant – despite the fact that learners still get picked on. Anyway, according to the instructor, he says I’m a good 7-8 lessons from my test booking so I guess I’ll be doing just that. Tmr is my next lesson. After many many months of procrastination and fear, I’m finally looking forward to Tuesdays cuz they’re my lesson days.

Wednesday was the first time in many years (last time was Sec 3 cross country quarter-finals) that I went to Macritchie Reservoir Park to pre-train for the 2nd TNF progressive (since I missed the first one). Thanks to Hussain for organizing and getting people to go for it cuz I think it was really really helpful to know what I was up against. Well, didn’t help much on Sat but that I’ll write later. So we were off with our hydration packs and new trail shoes to train for TNF and it was pretty difficult 10k run i’ve done in a long long time. Although it was multiple upslopes which I realized was my strength, and I kept whacking everyone of them, when it came to downslopes, I slowed down a lot – in the interest of my knees. Anyway, Hussain and me did the ‘Yellow’ 10.5km route in about 1h02m. Pretty good time I would say.

PRC’s ‘Recce Team’ – As Hussain calls it. (L-R) John, Choon Hong, Me, Hussain and Why See

Saturday, we carried out the full scale progressive run of 22+km ar MR again. This time, it was nothing short of hell and taught all of us runners what we’re up against. Thanks to Choon Hong’s ex-classmate, Ricki (aka The Bug) who’s a super pro and a damn fun fella to run with, we were orientated to the terrain pretty well. This time ard, we ran from MR Reserve to Bukit Timah Reserve and back. This of course, included Bt Timah hill – where it really really tested my upslope mettle – gotta thank NUS/Kent Rigde slopes for all the sufferring that partially prep-ed me for this madness of a run. Elaine (my TNF partner, who I shall refer to as ‘Partner’ henceforth) was sick all week but she’s an awesome runner too. Turning up in her 70.3 top, she’s really mentally strong. But the award for the most amazing person goes to Hussain – who did the distance at a really fast pace – during fasting month. I have no frakkin’ idea how the heck he managed to go all the way for 2h31m without a single drop of water and no glucose intake – considering he had the rest of the day left too! But we all did it and came out in one piece. For the 25km-ers they were pleased tt they can make it. For us 50km-ers, this was indeed a matter of concern – this was not even 1/2 the distance and we were maxed out.

At the Bukit Timah and MR junction

Summit of Bukit Timah Hill

Hmmm… I hope Saturday’s 20km progressive is much better. It better be, RunNUS is on the next day. Or else Jimmy and me are gonna suffer. (Maybe not Jimmy since he’s an 84km finisher!)

Partner and Me (Yeap… she’s always this hyper)

Since it has been sweaty and dirty all over the past two weeks, I haven’t gotten an opportunity to show the new PRC running singlet. It’s reddish-pink (to appease both sexes, I suppose) and pretty catchy!

Here goes:

As for RunNUS singlet, as it was last year, this year’s singlet is pretty nice too! The colour matches nicely with the new NB tri-tights that I bought for myself on Tuesday from Tampines-1.

Here goes again:

Also, I forgot to post this for a long long time. This is my first running medal ever! In Pri 4 (in India) for some 400m race where I came in 2nd. Haha… it says 1993! OMG!

As for the title, press Windows Key + R and you’ll know what I’m talking about!

Eisbrecher – Ohne Dich

I burn for you
I can’t breath without you
You forgive because you love
I fall for you
I can no longer stand up without you
You understand because you love

What is the sun without your light
What is a picture without your face
I have cursed life
I have tried to live alone
But I can’t

Without you I can’t be free
Without you I can’t be endlessly high
Without you I am alone
Without you I can’t fly
Without you I can’t endlessly love
Without you I cannot be

I awake for you
I can’t feel anything without you
You liberate you forgive
I drown in you
I feel your heart beat deep in me
You understand because you love

What is the sun without your light
What is a picture without your face
I have cursed life
I have tried to live alone
But I can’t

Without you I can’t be free
Without you I can’t be endlessly high
Without you I am alone
Without you I can’t fly
Without you I can’t endlessly love
Without you I cannot be

I pray to God that this never ends
That your fire will dazzle me forever
I miss you, I count every second
Without your mercy I will go under

What is the sun without your light
What is a picture without your face
I have cursed life
I have tried to live alone
But I can’t

Without you I can’t be free
Without you I can’t be endlessly high
Without you I am alone
Without you I can’t fly
Without you I can’t endlessly love
Without you I cannot be

And suddenly

I don’t feel like doing anything anymore…

New Divide

The joy of Running?

Everyone’s heard and read about how good it feels to run a race and cross the finish line and how awesome it feels to be appreciated by just the look on people’s faces when you tell them that you ran a marathon.

The first one  was during my run with Team FatBird two Saturdays ago – when the heavens poured down in full blast. I had to make do when my target was just to finish the 15km of pain through the rain and winds drenched from head to toe. No stop, no surrender. The only thing I could drink to prevent dehydration was my own sweat from the first 10km mixed with rain water straight from my singlet. Aweful and unthinkable? I think sometimes, we’re all driven to a point of madness just to finish the shittiest part of the deal.

Last SUnday I realized: The real joy is not the joy. That’s just the great feeling after you hit rock bottom during the run. I had mine on Sunday during the 19km run. It was not only hot and humid cuz the sun was at full blast, it was my first time running without music – the sweet distraction that had me occupied since my first days since I resumed long distance running. Also, my hip had been hurting like hell since 10km+ and the dehydration didn’t make it any better. But, my motto of no surrender – I did finish 19km in 1hr 54mins. Tired to the point of not just worn out physically but emotionally. Was almost in tears by the time I san the last bit back to base.

I have no idea how I’m gonna deal with NorthFace 100 which is going to be twice as gruelling compared to anything I’ve done before. Again, no surrender.

I need a reason to endure though it. And I need to find that reason – real fast. Or else, every run will be a pain.

Interes-Ted

Seems like I’ve finally let my anger go now. I’m no longer upset about the past and although it took me so long to avoid, ignore and keep it all in, I don’t know when in this time, it all went away.

I’m ready to move forward.

This became so much more apparent when I was watching How I Met Your Mother. Ted, a single guy, who’s looking for his future wife, gets to know Stella – a separated mom of a 7 year old daughter. He gets to know her better and they end up almost at the altar – where she leaves him to go back to her ex-husband, Tony. He’s angry and sad and a whole host of things that one would feel but eventually, sees the light. As he narrates this story to his kids, 20+ yrs in the future, he says:

“…and that was it, in that moment I wasn’t angry anymore. I could see that Stella was meant to be with Tony.

Kids,

You may think that your only choices are to swallow your anger or throw it in someone’s face. But there is a third option, you can just let it go. And only when you do that is it really gone, and you can move forward.

And that kids, was the perfect ending to a perfect love story. It just wasn’t mine. Mine was still out there, waiting for me…”

~ Ted Mosby

Anamika

As promised, here’s a Kishore-da song…. my all time fav.

Legendary Trip 2!

To con-tin-new where I left off last night, on 20th June, I left for my hometown, Bhubaneswar (BBSR) with Pupsy since dad was fine on his own. I bought my first non-aeriated drink at the Airport and it was one of my fav fully awesome ones – Snapple – Mango Madness. =)

Everyone was so thrilled that I was back that I was very touched and felt the love all around me, esp my cousins and granny – who I still insist was trying to flirt with me!

I went for a concert since we had passes and one of my sister-in-laws was singing and my uncle’s childhood friend was playing – Kishore Kumar was a music genius… Legen-wait for it-dary! Shall post one of my fav songs once I’m done with this. =)

The lead singer – had almost the same voice and look like Kishore-da

This lady was the stage turner for the duet – love the chemistry betwn them – her voice sucked though! =p

Prutyasha (hope I got that right) one of my distant sister-in-laws also sang a few songs – her voice was so much nicer!

My uncle’s childhood fren – lost in the passion of music. =)

The next day was Sunday, so we could whack a day trip! Off we went to Maa Tarini temple where apparently, if u make a coconut offerring and ask for something, you’re sure to get it. Well, it’s kinda obvious what I asked for. We met up with Sukanya’s family on the day trip – who’s close to Sush’s family too.

Sush and me again!

My eldest uncle and Sush

My youngest uncle

Sush’s Dad

The people who went there

Sush and Sukanya’s Sis

I loved this hut – looks so laid back

This is a crap translation of the name of the place – esp for a hotel!

The week after that was the annual Chariot Festival, where the God goes his aunt’s house for a few months. SO to celebrate this, we had prayers that day. A few years back, I sat for the prayers but this year i had a bad tummy ache, so my eldest uncle sat for the prayers.

The holy fire

The aunt-home-going God and his siblings

Our family butler (Hari) who came the house the very day I was born =)

The prayer offerings which Hari cooked – Love his food! Awesome! =p

Then we went over to my cousin’s place to see my nephew of 7 months. He’s so chubby and cute!

Spoilt brat loves the air-con! His little piece of heaven that is…

Cousin and me

Then we went over to my eldest cousin’s place to meet her and her family. I love the verbal jostling with her cuz she’s really damn funny and witty! Her husband on the other hand is damn shy and he can’t say shit but just blushes and gives up! Damn cute couple!

Husband, wife and me

Retro casette!

My youngest 2 cousins

Sush and me

Super whacking session!

Dinner plan was with my two yougest cousins and Sush. We went to Tangerine 9 and whacked till we were full, fat and happy! Haha… We talked so much cork that we were reeling laughing for next three good hours. My youngest cousin literally fell down laughing! This went on for a good four nights over dinner! =p

My cousin and me went to Mayfair, a super posh shopping area to do some window shopping! Her treat for the evening! =)

I loved the colourfulness of the place!

Yummynessess!

A couple of days, we went to puri Jaganath – the God who went to aunt’s place. Apparently, very few people can get to see him there and so it was a unique opportunity cuz it was not as crowded – ually there are 1/2 million people there at once – i do not mean figuratively, there are crowds of 1/2 million on festive days.

My niece

And cousin

Niece, a distant nephew and me.  The fella is damn funny! We had an awesome time!

And one last whacking session with cousin – Haka.

The buffet is damn worth it! 4 Sing dollars! =p

One last pic – cuz she wanted to look taller! =p

I miss the place and the people already! Most probably, my next trip… will be my wedding. =)

My Legendary Trip 1!

Is what I would call my trip to India this time around! Well.. besides having a lot of fun and carbo loading till I gained 3 kgs(!), I actually kinda re-conciled what I’ve been looking for and what I’ve been missing out on. One point of self-discovery is that no matter where I live and where I work, I will always want to go back there from time to time – cuz at one point in time or the other, I miss the place really dearly – not just the food or the people, the feeling of being settled and being back home – with family.

This post is gonna be a shorter version of the looong story that I’ll prob tell u ppl in parts! So here goes! =)

Vidhana Soudha at night – There’s a cheesy line written on the top… try to read it!

Our driver, Viswanath tried his best to take a pic… after much much coaxing!

My cousin and me (mum not in pic) are squeezed into out little car at the back! =p

The ladies

And the gents

And began the holiest week of many years I’ve had in a long long time! I went to a new temple literally everyday from Iskon in Bangalore to Tirupati to the temple near our house to even Puri Jaganath – after the Chariot Festival. Like my cousin told me, we’re gonna have a life full of blessings considering how many temples we’ve been to so far!

Iskon Temple, Bangalore

Then I wanted to take pics of our house in BLR and wow! The mansion is a mother load so huge that I had to take samples of the Taj Mahal mum and dad had built after a lot of pain and sweat.

Balcony

Living Room 1

Living Room 2

Bedroom

Prayer Room

Grand Staircases… slippery too!

A REAL dorky pic of me on the living room wall. Taken when I was in Sec 2… I can see why I was alone with no frenz!

Look at the hair, the tummy, the glasses, the bloody backpack! SHEESH!

The next day, we headed to Mysore, a small place near BLR (abt 280kms away) which was the capital of the state previously. I had been there last when I was 6 or 7 and so for me, it was like being there for the first time again! As for mum and dad, it was a second honeymoon trip to what was 26 yrs ago! OMG! And for me… I took a pic for comparison. Once the old pics are scanned and up, I’ll show u ppl – promise!

Sleeping Vishnu Temple

Tipu Sultan’s Summer Palace

Cam-whoring again…

Honeymoon pic spot – 26 yrs on, Chamundibetta Temple

Temple outside Mysore Palace

Mysore Palace

YELPS!

A pic of me at the very same spot after 25 yrs… I’ll show u when I scan the original

The musical fountain

And the beautiful dome fountain – my fav of all!

A pic of the place from practically every Bollywood movie in the 80s and early 90s.

The next day, we intended to go to the Museum and the Planetorium – obviously, nothing happened when we met up with Sukanya – Pupsy’s fren who lives in BLR. All we did was the take a lot of pics and talk a lot of rubbish and played UNO – to the point we even forgot our tea and screwed the initial plans! Totally worth it! =)

Sukanya and Sushree

And the three S-ess (No puns intended)

Sukanya in her beloved room with her beloved kapohed lampshade

Evening, we headed down to Prabha aunty’s house to meet Vani Didi and Ajay. They were so young I last remember them tt Didi now has a son of the same age that I was when I first knew them! OMG! After so long, I didn’t even know where to start trying to catch up. Btw, the house Ajay built for his dad and mum is so beautiful and functional, as an engineer, it makes me tear in joy! Then we 4 went for a quick dinner to retire for the night… cuz next up was Tirupati.

A nice place just near home. =)

Love BLR, the weather is so nice u look exactly the way when u left home after ure bk!

The next day, our road trip began at 430am to Sukanya’s place and picked her up and off we went to Tirupati. Although I was hoping to get to know her better, the poor girl had a whole trip of motion sickness – which our driver Mahadev was very nice to constantly look for drug stores to buy medication. Also, he knows so much that he made the trip worthwhile and cracked a lot of funny jokes along the way. The two of them were def lost.. and I had to laugh twice – once with Mahadev and once more after translating it! My Kannada was surely brushed up at the end of the trip! =)

5am from a Hyundai Tucson

Outside

And Inside

Ms. Motion Sickness with her power Remedy

We’re still good to go… till the ascend began. After tt we all looked the same

The awesomest driver, Mahadev!

Sukanya and Me at Woody’s – I ALWAYS loved to stop here for tea since I was a kid!

The next big thing was shopping and what we did instead was eat more and take more pics! We found this huge butterfly made of paper cups in a shopping mall! It’s to raise awareness of re-cycling and re-using. But for us, it’s just another prop!

After this I headed to my hometown which I’ll continue in Part 2 cuz its almost 3am now… OMG!

Shitty Holiday

The biggest made this year was to go to India for a holiday…

I should have just stayed alone at home. Better than the daily brain fucking over here. Sheesh… I’m pissed off and I wanna come back home asap.

I’m off

To India! After almost 3 months of waiting, its gonna be great seeing mum and dad again tonight! =)

And I leave behind friends and loved ones… for a month! I’ll be contactable by email though so keep me updated people! And I hope I can blog too!

Miss you peeps!

After 9 Years

At times, I still feel the same. Yeah no doubt asking is gonna be… demoralizing.

That doesn’t mean I’m not gonna do it. 

Life changes with one big…. swoosh!

Now, I really wanna try out The Greatest Race on Earth. Or at least, the HK one… I have a strong motivation. =)